What's Next - Kid's First Bowflex?

Recently at work, I saw a package for Kid's First Treadmill from First Fitness. Here's how it looks once assembled:

Call me crazy, but back in my day, "kid's first treadmill" was the back yard, the playground, the park, or even the inside of the house. What kills me is that the box lists its many advantages, such as: it will help your kids develop muscle conditioning and balance for outdoor sports. So you can pay $110 to help your kid get that muscle conditioning and balance for outdoor sports, or you can, for free, take your kid to the park and play outdoor sports with them. The box also says it helps "promote a lifetime of fitness." Or a lifetime of gym memberships.

Are we that lazy that we make our kids get on a treadmill to get exercise? Here's some ideas that won't cost you much if anything: stop playing so darn much XBox; parents - feed your kids other foods than fried, sugar-filled, and packaged in wrappers; go outside and play with your kids; watch TV less; dust off and ride that bike.

Not Really What Was Meant By "Leaving Your Mark"

Poor Birdie! :(

I was at Raymond Walters College (a branch of the University of Cincinnati) a couple of weeks ago when I saw something in the window. I thought it was some fake, something an art student had done as a joke. But it was on the outside of the window, so I realized it's probably not a fake. Poor birdie. He (or she) was just flying along one day, saw an "open" window, and went for it, thinking Yes! I'm finally I'm going to get ins--- [SMACK]

No Linguistic Socialism In Church

I read an interesting article the other day from the Nov. 18 issue of Christian Standard. Paul Williams, who writes the "And So It Goes" column, asked the question, "is keeping it simple always a good idea?" The idea of the article is that in many places and environments, insider language is expected and appropriate. If you don't know it, you will learn it in time.

He writes, "In the world of growing churches we are always encouraged to keep our language seventh-grade generic, the language of the people. Don't speak so you can be understood. Speak so you cannot be misunderstood." And later, "I want to be sensitive to those just beginning the spiritual journey, but there are times I also want to praise God for his omnipotence."

He's onto something here; for a long time, I have bristled at churches that "dumb down" everything for the sake of being relevant and understandable. It seems their M.O. is "small words leads to big numbers." Perhaps that's too harsh, but there is a trend of not using insider language so nobody feels left out or stupid. This trend is ubiquitous in contemporary worship songs. Generally, I don't have a problem with such songs; I often listen to my local Christian station, WAKW. And there are some great songs out there now (by the likes of Matt Redman and Chris Tomlin); they certainly have gotten better since the 90s, showing a renewed passion for worship songs (not just feel-good Christian songs) and songs that don't try to be too dramatic (like the melodramatic Carman) but seek to just tell God how you feel. That said, though, there sure is a lot of fluff out there, too (Trading My Sorrows, I Could Sing of Your Love Forever, and just about anything with "River" in it - thanks Danny for the idea - love it!).

Here's what I offer for your consideration: why don't we use big words, then explain them so people will: a) learn their meaning, and b) benefit from it. We have some great words: propitiation, redemption, repentance, etc. - let's keep using them and explain them to the people. You could have a whole sermon on redemption. And hymns - keep them coming. Explain the words ("here I raise my Ebenezer, hither by thy help I've come"?), but keep them coming. Sure, maybe kick out the organ and jazz up the arrangement a bit, but hymns are often very powerful, memorable, and capable aids to worship. But one thing we should not do is become vocabulary socialists: people who "level the playing field" not by raising up those with a poor vocabulary, but by suppressing those with a rich vocabulary. Or as Mr. Williams suggests, "Maybe what we need to do is make a concerted effort to more quickly turn outsiders into insiders."

Oh, Dear - Oh, Deer! (And Trees)

I saw this the other day...kind of weird. There were two cars stopped on the side of Miami Road, some broken pieces of plastic on the shoulder. And a deer standing there, motionless, watching the whole thing. I guess someone hit the deer (it was holding its leg up) but not enough to do much damage either to the deer or the car. The cops came (the black SUV), and I drove by before I saw the aftermath (which probably will result in some tasty deer jerky for someone).

And I saw this tree at the park where I usually start my running routes. The color is amazing. Thank you, Father, for making your creation more beautiful than it needs to be.

Shameless Self-promotion

I wrote an opinion article for the Cincinnati Enquirer last week about that middle school in Maine that started giving away birth control pills to girls as young as 11, and that without parental knowledge.

It's essentially the same as my earlier post about it on this blog. You can read about it here. Hopefully, someone will read it and say, "You know, I'm totally pro-choice, but I get what he's saying and I agree." That's the ideal; they will probably actually say, "what do you know? A fundy's preaching yet again!"

Half Marathon Training Check-In

Here's what happened in October:

Not the best month! I was sick off and on for three weeks, so I took a week and a half off (which would have been about 18-20 miles). Also, McDonald's had their Monopoly contest, and I got sucked into it yet again (note my weight).

(Note: last month's numbers are in parentheses)

Weight: 220 (219)

Pounds to target weight: 25 (24)

Miles run this month: 34.2 (56.1)

Miles run this year: 494.0 (459.8)

Days until the Flying Pig Half Marathon: 186 (as of the 1st)

See you next month!

Today, Free Birth Control; Tomorrow; Free Abortions?

In a recent MSNBC.com article, a Maine middle school will now be giving birth control pills to middle-school students confidentially, that is, without their parents finding out. This is in addition to the condom distribution already happening there. Am I crazy, or does the fact that middle schools are giving birth control pills to girls as young as 11 years old just, as one radio talk show host says, "make blood shoot out of your eyes"?

What's next, adding abortion clinics onto the nurse's office at school? This goes back to an earlier post I made regarding condom distribution in schools. If condom distribution was to help curb disease, what is giving birth control good for? It does nothing to stop STDs. One way to look at this is to see that schools like this are removing excuses for "just being a kid" and are in fact encouraging promiscuity by making it easier to fix any potential problems. If we adopt their line of thinking, we should:

• distribute bongs, pipes, and Visine at school because "they're gonna smoke weed anyway"
• or better yet, set up a safe place to deal drugs so they won't have to go to skanky neighborhoods or dangerous meeting places
• teach students the proper use of a beer bong and distribute aspirin and Alka Seltzer on Mondays to hungover students because "they're gonna drink anyway"
• host "safe drinking nights" for teens at the school so the kids can "be safe" In fact, why not just cancel Homecoming and Prom and go straight to giving the kids the alcohol and private bedrooms they desire (equipped with condoms and birth control pills, of course) because that's what they're going to do anyway.
• give away clean hypodermic needles so at least the student junkies won't get AIDS or hepatitis from dirty needles because (you guessed it) "they're gonna shoot up anyway"

As others have also brought up, why not give the kids trans fats (they're gonna eat them anyway), caffeinated soft drinks, and other things the kids want? Oh yeah, BECAUSE IT'S BAD FOR THEM. Also, because THEY'RE ELEVEN!!! They are too young to be trusted with a lot of personal decisions because their brains are still developing and they cannot properly and rationally think through complicated issues like sexuality.

This is what happens when "what's true/right for you may not be true/right for me." This is the bastard child of Tolerance and Don't Judge Me.

It used to be that there was this place kids could go to learn about how to live life responsibly, be polite to adults, clean their rooms, and learn about the birds and the bees, a little place called "home." Now, we trust the American school system (which ranks near the bottom of school system effectiveness) to do this for us? [Shiver runs up spine]

I think that people whose Christmas wish lists are headlined by XBoxes and stuff from Berkley Girl should not be allowed to have sex at all, let alone be trusted to "come to their own conclusions" about it.